Friday, August 7, 2015

Occasionally Ava- The Story of a Beautiful Cross Dresser


Every cross dresser has their own journey on what made them who they are today. Some dress all the time and enjoy going out in femme and others prefer to dress in the comfort of their own home. Glamourboutique.com takes pride in being able to share each individual's story.

Our friend, Ava has been kind enough to take the time to let us in on her very humbling life. She is such a beautiful individual inside and out so we are so grateful we get to share this with all of you.

Ava's interest in femininity started way back to when she was in preschool. She finds comfort in dressing occasionally and talking to others like herself online.  Sharing her story and her beauty with the world is something really special, and although she cannot become an activist right now as she someday wishes, we hope her story will add some comfort to your life like others have done for her.



"The oldest of four brothers, I grew up in a middle class family on the Norwegian Atlantic Coast. My parents are loving, hard-working people, not rich but we had what´s important in life. Christian Faith was dominant in a way, although I have tried not to impose this on my own children, yet still I don’t think religion had any influence on my girly development.

My first transgenderish memories go back to preschool years. The girl next door wore dresses and pantyhose in the playground and I remember envying her. Through adolescence I read all I could find on girl stuff; my mother´s magazines on fashion and  makeup, interviews with beautiful celebrities and especially makeover pieces. Though I mostly identified as a boy, I never found interest in sports and spent much time alone making different stuff, sewing, drawing, doing woodwork, playing with mechanics. Socially I was kind of a hermit and I never revealed my inner feelings to anyone.   

Then came the army, college, university, marriage and family. I got busy doing typical young professional and father things and the girly urges were gone for twenty years. I thought I was cured, of course, finally settled as a MAN! Then everything came back in my late thirties, at my despair, and dealing with it took a lot of energy. I started showing signs of depression and my wife, who is an extraordinary woman, worried about me. One evening, in a restaurant, I told her I am a transvestite. This wasn´t planned, but I was exhausted from keeping secrets from her and it just slipped over the table. She freaked out and raised the expected “you are gay? You want to leave me?” questions, but we held it together and she relaxed gradually. She has come to terms with it now, but wants no part in it and does not want to see me en femme. 




Since then, I have found a sense of comfort in being an occasional cross dresser. I ponder less than before and find it relaxing but even more important, as a source of like-minded friends all over the world. From the girls I have met I feel us to be so similar in many ways; in acceptance, empathy and generally liberal attitudes to life and work. The feeling that I am one of thousands, maybe millions, is crucial to my self-esteem and sense of security in life.

I do not go out dressed. Clubbing has never attracted me as I am basically an introvert but still, I find great joy in being with other girls in safe and quiet settings. If I were to go out regularly, it would be with a dream of not drawing attention, just being accepted as a tall, good looking person. The aesthetics of human beauty are universal to me. I try not to see specific “female” and “masculine” forms, rather a distinction between rough/empowered and soft/sophisticated ones. 


Our culture assigns rough/empowered expressions to men with women gradually adopting them, while the soft/sophisticated ones remain women only. I hope this will change and if I were single, I might become an activist for the cause. Being a father of three in a small town though, I see this choice might expose my dearest ones in a way I cannot control. Thus, I will probably wait for my kids to grow up and leave the nest before I take my female passions to the next level. 

Thank you to Glamour Boutique for being a safe harbor and inspiration to us all, and for presenting our stories."

Love, 

Ava 


If you would like to share your story with glamourboutique.com please contact us at kcantwellgb@gmail.com. We would love to hear from you!

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